The Pain of a Singer
by ALaViola
Summary: Lucy Heartfillea is a talented girl with great friends, they know everything about her. Or do they? Do they know of the pain she goes through at home? Do they know about her musical talent? Do they know the meaning behind the songs she sings? Do they think they can save her in time? Do they really know 'The Pain of a Singer?


**Hey!**

**So this is my first story!**

**It has been edited now that it is finished**

**so I hope it is smoother than when it was first published!**

**The cover image was made by me but I cropped the image of Lucy onto the background**

**and put a pencil in her hand(plus a few more edits).**

**Thanks so much for reading!**

**_Disclaimer: I do not own Fairy Tail._**

**Enjoy!**

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**_The Pain Of A Singer_**

**_'There's a boy, lost his way, looking for someone to play-'_**

**_Prologue_**

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**_~QOoOQ~_**

**_'My name is Lucy  
I am Twelve,  
My eyes are swollen  
I cannot see.'_**

Brown eyes stared blankly at the night sky. It was only a little past midnight but she could barely stand to keep her heavy eyes open. The little girl just wanted to rest and have a nice nap but surely she would have a rude awakening had she fallen asleep before her Father come back home. She let out a soft sigh and gazed at the beautiful, twinkling stars. She wished she could be as beautiful as a star and shine just as brightly, but she was only a normal girl with abnormal surroundings.

Perhaps she was different in the sense that others were not like her but the young girl wished for more than just that. Everyone could shine in their own way, doctors, nurses, police-they all showed extraordinary talents and skills in their jobs but within different fields. She herself, wanted to sing and shine under the lights on stage. She wanted to be that inspiration for young girls and boys, but she was only Lucy Heartfilia.

**_'I must be stupid  
I must be bad,  
What else could have made  
My daddy so mad?'_**

Tears dripped down her face. Her father would most definitely be upset by her thoughts. He thought singing to be a waste of time but she had inherited her love of music from her mother; Layla Heartfilia. Lucy's father, Jude Heartfilia, had once been a music lover himself but after the incident which cause her mother death, Lucy's father had never looked at music the same way. If he had ever hear so much as a simple hum or whistle form one of the maids then they would immediately be thrown out of their estate without any exceptions.

Once she recalled a time where she had brought home a paper filled with lyrics for her Music class and proudly exposed her high grade to her father in hopes of making him smile once more but she had only gotten a brutal punishment as retaliation. She wondered why her father was so mad at her, had she not made him proud of the high mark she had gotten? Then again, he was never happy with anything she did.

**_'I wish I were better  
I wish I weren't ugly,  
Then maybe my mommy  
Would still want to hug me.'_**

Her mind raced with thoughts of her father and her love of music. She didn't know why he hated it so much. Music was what made her mother who she was and was taking a large part in her life, without her music, Lucy didn't know who she would be. Maybe she would have broken down and cried every night to get herself to sleep. Maybe she would be following after her mother into the afterlife. It wasn't as if she hadn't thought of it. The idea was appealing, although her mother didn't raise a defenseless child. From what her father said, her mother was very strong. Although she knew this.

Lucy toughed it out. She would endure everything that was thrown at her and she would not go down without a fight, there would be times where she needed to let out her pain and frustration but she would never resort to taking her own life. Not as long as she knew her mother was watching over her and giving her strength alone, otherwise she wasn't sure whether or not she could do it alone.

**_'I can't speak at all  
I can't do a wrong  
Or else I'm locked up  
All the day long.'_**

Lucy mostly kept to herself when her father was home. What point was there in speaking to him at all? He had clearly shown his disinterest so what did it matter? She hated feeling alone but if being alone was what kept her father's wrath at bay than she would keep quiet for the rest of her life, she hoped she wouldn't have to. It was hard keeping this secret form all her friends, they loved her dearly and showed their concern for her bluntly, if she had to hide it much longer than maybe she would just break down.

Her mother had always told Lucy that keeping everything bottled up inside was not healthy for the person doing it nor the people around her. It affects that persons mind and it affected their relationships with other people. Perhaps she could go to the maids but they were paid to stay silent and not lend her an ear, she would have more progress with a wall than any of them.

**_'When I awake  
I'm all alone  
The house is dark  
My folks aren't home.'_**

A thought appeared in her mind, one that constantly bothered her. Maybe she could run? Maybe she could hide from her father's evil, prying eyes. _That wouldn't work._ She denied. _I would be caught at any moment and be dragged back to where I started. _It would not be the best option she could take with the possibility of her being found and even possibly being beaten to death by her father for taking such an action. Would she take that risk? There was a small chance at freedom if she succeeded.

Mavis listen to her! She sounded like a tortured slave instead of the daughter of Jude Heartfilia. Although that was what she is, isn't it? A slave? She was a slave to her father and a slave to the place she called home. Lucy looked at the picture of her mother beside her, the woman's smile bright and happy. She could be like that again if she left._ I'm sorry Mama_. She grabbed a small bag and began to pack some necessities.

**_'When my daddy does come  
I'll try and be nice,  
So maybe I'll get just  
One whipping tonight.'_**

Clothing, shoes, a book, her doll and some food. Maybe she should pack a blanket? Lucy looked at her overflowing bag and shook her head with a sad sigh. No blanket, a thick sweater she be enough to last her until the winter... or until she was able to grab some money from someone. She paused, she needed to get a job too if she wanted any chance of this working. Maybe a new name? Her eyes widened at the thought, maybe she could sing for her new job and use her mother name, music could come back into her life!

Lucy smiled and finished her packing before quickly shuffling down the stairs. She was almost there! She pulled her small boots onto her feet and opened the door to welcome the dark, cool night. She was going to be free again!

**_'Don't make a sound!  
I just heard a car  
My daddy is back  
From Charlie's Bar.'_**

Lucy froze. Oh Mavis her father came back early! She looked down at her small watch and saw it was almost one. Normally he didn't come home until around three but for some reason he came home earlier than usual. Did he get in a fight? Her father had done that once and had come home earlier after being kicked out of the bar and had come home a drunk mess. Inevitably, his anger was taken out on her. She shook her head and searched the room. She could hear her father coming up the porch steps.

_Hide!_

**_'I hear him curse  
My name he calls  
I press myself  
Against the wall.'_**

_Please don't see me! _Lucy dropped her bag and pressed herself behind one of the bookshelves in the living room. Hopefully he wouldn't find her. Maybe he was too drunk and disoriented to notice anything out of the ordinary. Although that was nothing but a wish. Her father, even when drunk, was very observant-he could notice a small crack in the wall in the dark, noticing her breathing would not be complicated for Jude Heartfilia.

He stepped into the room unsteadily. He must have drank a lot. His work had probably been tough that day, or he could have just had unpleasant memories of her mother. Either one was bad for her. He paused at the entrance and glanced around the room. She squirmed away from the edge of the shelf. Oh Mavis, had he noticed?

_Don't notice me!_

**_'I try and hide  
From his evil eyes  
I'm so afraid now  
I'm starting to cry.'_**

She could feel immense heat pooling in her eyes. Don't cry yet! She squeezed her eyes shut and clenched her hands into fists. If she made even the smallest noise he would know she was there. Lucy stiffened. Oh Mavis he was looking for her for that reason, she was supposed to be there, waiting for him but she had been in a rush to hide herself and her bag that she had forgotten.

He walks around the room slowly. Observing everything around him, he was going to find her and she knew it but maybe she still had a chance! The tears began to fall.

Who was she kidding?

**_'He finds me weeping  
He shouts ugly words,  
He says its my fault  
That he suffers at work.'_**

His looming figure stopped in front of the bookshelf. He found her. Lucy let out the breath she had been holding and reluctantly allowed her father to drag her out from behind the shelf along with her packed bag. His dark, dilated eyes take in the sight of her dressed body and covered feet before looking at her packed bag. His nostrils flare. "What were you planning on doing!?" He grips a handful of her hair and spits in her face. "You weren't planning on running away were you? Because you know how disgraceful that would be."

She whimpered. "I'm sorry, Papa!"

"Fucking hell." He yells. "I come back from drinking after a rough day at work and I come home to see my Slut of a daughter trying to run away from me!?" Her tears fall relentlessly.

_"I'm sorry!"_

**_'He slaps me and hits me  
And yells at me more,  
I finally get free  
And I run for the door.'_**

The power of the blow landed on her face sends her tumbling to the floor. Lucy holds her bruised cheek gently and shivered in fear. He hits her again and again showing no signs of stopping. Her head began to throb and her body ached. When will it end? He was furious. Maybe he wouldn't stop this time? Maybe he would finish her off.

That would be merciful.

He stops to take a breather. That's it! Her chance! She hastily stood and raced toward the door. She could out run him when drunk. She was faster than him even when he was sober but when he was drunk she would have even more of an advantage. Lucy reached up and grabbed the knob with a small amount of hope running through her. She could escape.

**_'He's already locked it  
And I start to bawl  
He takes me and throws me  
Against the hard wall.'_**

The sound of the lock clicking brought down the dreadful reality and she collapsed on the floor. Her last chance to escape. She heard her father screech. He was seething now, beyond the acceptance of an apology. He was seeking blood now and it terrified her. Lucy hadn't seen this side of him since the night her mother died.

The reality of losing her must have brought his anger full force.

Why would he care? Sometimes she questioned that too. He kicked her and threw her into the sturdy wall. He still loved her didn't he? He was just blinded by the pain and the booze. Maybe if she helped him stop his drinking habits he would once again return to the happy and caring father she once knew. It was wishful thinking.

That man was no longer existing within her father.

**_'I fall to the floor  
With my bones nearly broken,  
And my daddy continues  
With more bad words spoken.'_**

Pain rushed through her and black dots clouded her vision. It was so hard to see now but she could just barely make out the angry face of her father. She wanted him to stop. Lucy wondered if he felt as bad as she did. _Do you hurt too Papa? Is the pain too much for you that you need to let me have some of it? Papa I don't know how much more I can take._

_It _hurts_ Papa._

**_'"I'm sorry!", I scream  
But it's now much too late.  
His face has been twisted  
Into unimaginable hate.'_**

Another punch followed by a kick. "Please Papa! I promise I won't do it again!" She cries desperately. "I'm sorry! I won't do it again!" He wasn't listening, she realized. His anger was blocking out all of his senses. His eyes were clouded and his face was red, his calloused hands were rough on her skin and his muscles were tense. She blinked sleepily. Her senses were beginning to numb and she could barely feel her father's hands bruising her body over and over again.

**_'The hurt and the pain  
Again and again.  
Oh please Mavis, have mercy!  
Oh please let it end!'_**

_Papa please stop._

_It hurts so much._

_Can't you see? You're hurting me?_

_You know I love you, don't you?_

_Do you really love me?_

_Can you look me in the eye and tell me?_

_I want to know Papa._

_Do you love me?_

_It hurts._

**_'And he finally stops  
And heads for the door,  
While I lay there motionless  
Sprawled on the floor.'_**

She could barely keep her eyes open. She felt weak and heavy. Would a nap be acceptable? He couldn't expect her to stay awake after taking such a beating and loosing so much blood, could he? Her father wouldn't hurt her if she just rested for a little bit, could he? She was so, so tired. Lucy knew it was not the best idea for her to close her eyes and rest but her father wouldn't let her follow her mother just yet, he wasn't done with her.

She was feeling so cold. Why was it so cold? Her fingers and toes were going numb and she could barely hear anything anymore. Only the faint sound of her father's retreating footsteps could be heard from her position. What time was it now? It must be really late now. Should she rest? Or will her father be going out again? Too tired. Rest. It was time to say goodbye and close her eyes.

**_'My name is Lucy  
And I am twelve,  
And Tonight my daddy  
Almost Murdered me.'_**

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**_The Pain Of A Singer_**

**_'-There's a girl in the window tears rolling down her face.'_**

**_First Song_**

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**Tanensei no honō:**** So I used a poem I found on someone's bio trying to spread the word about child abuse and made a few tweaks to fit the story. I thought this would create the tone a little more and make you feel a little more tense/ uneasy. Sorry if that disturbed some of you but this story does center around Lucy's relationship with her father and a lot of NaLu so if you can handle this stuff then great but if you can't then that's okay! The song used in the beginning and end of the story is from Demi Lavato called 'Two Pieces.' Thank you so much for reading!**

**Love it? Hate it? Review**


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